ROAD REPORT
MON JAN 11, 1999
LOS ANGELES, CA

WE RESIGN!!! -- WON'T HAVE ROAD REPORT TO KICK AROUND ANYMORE!!!

In the last few hours, since leaving Zion National Park, [a day and half in Utah and we weren't able to receive a single bribe!], staying overnight in the Nevada Border "Town" of Primm, where we gambled and sometimes lost, it has become evident to us...that we are home.

So it with great regret and much sadness that we have decided -- as of right now -- that we will resign as ROAD REPORTers of the United States.

We've had many great days, and have made many great friends along the way. Some better than worse. Most of them just worse. But all the time, we've always remembered those immortal words of Teddy Roosevelt; something about being in the arena and it being really swell etc. etc. etc...

We thank you -- the American People -- for entrusting to us this important job of bringing you all the news we saw fit to print from the seedy scandals to the moving moments to the flat-out fiction of our imagination. Without you, we'd be...without you.

And so, in parting, we say; Your enemies may hate you, but they can never...never...something or other.

And with those words, we offer just a few last shots from hither and yon...Happy Trails America...till we meet again...

Peaking at Zion...Desi under the falls...if only life weren't so pixilated, perhaps you'd understand...

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Working the beat...bringing you the ROAD REPORT...

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Anxiously awaiting us back at the ranch. [Clockwise from Top Left] Zim the Cat, Rob the Cat Sitter, The Happy Homecoming...

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Where will the ROAD REPORT strike next...?

...Only the Shadows know...G'bye & Good Riddance, America...

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That's it! Go away already!!
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